How To Get What You Want From A One-Night Stand

by Audrey Andrews

on Nov 10, 2016

How to Get What You Want From a One Night Stand

Sex with no strings attached can leave you feeling liberated, confident and deeply satisfied. However, it does also have the potential to go… a little less than well.

Personally, I like to think of a one-night stand as a film sequel. It can be 200 minutes of intense, life-changing passion, much like The Godfather Part II.

It's also possible that you'll want to erase the entire evening from your memory, which is what I wanted to do after watching Grease 2.

So, in order to make sure that your one-night stand doesn't turn into a Mean Girls 2-style one-night flop, I've picked out 4 important things that you need to remember.

Remember, to have a successful one-night stand: be S.E.X.Y.

Be S.E.X.Y.

Safety first

You don't know this person from Adam (or Eve!). Use a condom.

You want smoking-hot memories of this night, not an uncomfortable souvenir. Listen to your gut instincts and use your common sense.

Stay safe, and make sure that someone knows who you're with and where you are at all times.


Suggesting new things can be daunting, especially when it comes to your sex life. There may be a position you've always wanted to try, or a role play scene you've always wanted to act out, but never felt totally comfortable suggesting to someone. A one-night stand is the perfect time to experiment, as the sex is just a one-time thing, and you may never see this person again.

So, be upfront about what you want. The worst that can happen is that they tell you they aren't really into nipple clamps, or dressing up as Obi-Wan Kenobi. And that's fine. You win some, you lose some. And hey, maybe they'll have some kinky suggestions of their own!

eXit plan

OK, I know this one ruins the acronym a bit, but it's crucial. You shouldn't stay the night if the vibe isn't right! Sometimes it's much better to leave after you've done the deed.

That way, you avoid trekking home the next day in last night's outfit. If the deed took place in your bed, don't feel bad about politely and respectfully asking them to leave. Offer to call them a taxi, and they'll soon take the hint.

You come first

When you are bumping uglies with someone you're in love with, sex is totally different. When you love someone, you do things to get them off that may not be your thing. That's what love is – sucking on someone's big toe because you know it will make them feel great, even if all toes do for you is remind you of Bilbo Baggins.

A one-night stand is different. You have no emotional attachments to this person, so it's OK to be a little selfish. If you don't fancy catering to their foot fetish, you don't have to lift a finger (or should that be toe?).

Try not to be completely selfish though. If both of you just lay on your backs, starfishing and putting in no effort, you're unlikely to have the best session of your life.

One-night stands are not a new phenomenon. They have been occurring since the first caveman lied about having work "really early" the next morning. But as long as you remember S.E.X.Y., your raunchy rendezvous will be memorable for all the right reasons.

Audrey Andrews is a student blogger for Lovehoney. In her spare time she loves to do craft, but would not advise knitting your own condoms.

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Audrey Andrews

Written by Audrey Andrews.

Originally published on Nov 10, 2016. Updated on Aug 6, 2020