If you've never unearthed the unbelievable delights of the prostate – or P-spot and male G-spot as it is also called – then you're in for a treat.
Heard about the wonders of prostate play? Curious to try it out yourself or with a partner but not sure where to begin? Don’t know what the heck we’re talking about but up for trying something new? This guide is here to show everything you need to know about finding and pleasuring your P-spot.
The prostate is a hidden erogenous zone found in people who were born with a penis and is an amazing little centre of pleasure. Massaging it via the anus can lead to insanely arousing stimulation and (if you play your cards right) explosive, full-body climaxes.
The prostate is a gland in the male reproductive system – this includes your penis, prostate, testicles and seminal vesicles. Usually the size of a walnut (which may grow as you get older), this important sexual organ is just below the bladder, behind the penis and in front of the rectum. It’s more often accessed via the anus but it can also be stimulated externally via the perineum or internally via the urethra but that is a whole different ball game (heh) to what we’re talking about today.
Fun fact: people born with a vagina have their own version of the prostate called the Skene's glands which are said to be the source of the fluid produced when squirting (which you can find out more about here if you want to).
As part of the reproductive system, the prostate’s main job is to produce the prostatic fluid that mixes with sperm to form ejaculate (or semen). As ejaculation occurs, the muscles in the prostate work to expel semen through the urethra. Not only does this climax feel amazing (as a lot of us know) but it’s also been shown to be an important part of clearing out your pipes from a build-up of toxins which can cause various infections or cancers.
In addition to its key role in the reproductive system, the prostate alone can be stimulated through the anus for sexual enjoyment and to produce intense orgasms. It’s for this reason that it has earned the nickname the “P-spot" or the “male G-spot". But how do we do reach this not-so elusive pleasure point?
Before you can experience prostate pleasure, you first need to know how to find the prostate, which is located below the bladder near the rectum. It is easier to find the prostate when you are sexually aroused because arousal triggers additional blood flow to the prostate, causing the P-spot to swell to a larger size. Get into some foreplay or masturbation before you begin and your search should become much easier.
To find yours, insert one or two lubed fingers into the anus and feel around, pointing your fingers upwards with your palm facing towards the belly button. It will feel quite different from the rest of the tissue inside the rectum, so it shouldn't be challenging to locate. As a guide, it should be about 2 inches inside but take your time to get a feel for it.
There are two main theories of why the prostate can create such incredible sensations.
One theory centres around the nerves attached to the prostate which stem internally to make orgasms feel more full-bodied – unlike the localised gratification of a penile orgasm.
The other theory considers the brain’s perception of prostate play. When paying more attention to the sensations occurring in the body – and in this case, the prostate – the brain can be “rewired” to feel more arousal in response to stimulation.
Once you’ve found the prostate, you shouldn’t have too much trouble exploring how it can make you feel good but it’s all about taking the time to do it. Try a few different motions with your fingers massaging your P-spot inside the anus to see how your body responds; a “come hither” stroke, a circular gyration and a rhythmic tap are all sound places to start.
If you can, try stroking the P-spot internally while simultaneously massaging the perineum (A.K.A. the taint) externally to come at the prostate from multiple angles. For a lot of people, the more pressure they put on the P-spot, the more pleasure they feel so make sure you gently test different levels of strength to see how it affects your arousal.
Once you’re feeling comfortable and have a good idea of where your P-spot is, you can get prostate toys (designed specifically to pleasure your P-spot) involved. Read more about how to use them here.
You can incorporate prostate play into oral, foreplay, penetration – just about any partnered or solo sex really – and you’ll be able to reap the serious benefits of insane dual stimulation.
I've heard about prostate milking – what is it?
Of course, prostate orgasms can feel amazing, so who wouldn't want to try and learn about prostate milking to take it to a whole new level?
Unfortunately, reaching orgasm through prostate stimulation can be pretty tricky. Some men milk their prostate for months or even years before they finally reach orgasm. When they do, though, they say it's one of the most amazing experiences of their lives!
So how do you milk your prostate?
When you've located your prostate, massage it with a finger or toy.
Try massaging the prostate in a consistent motion that feels good for you. Some people find it more pleasurable to masturbate at the same time or have some other sexual contact. When you're receiving the massage, you may have an incredibly intense orgasm, or you could sometimes get an odd sensation with fluid from the penis.
Make yourself comfortable
There are several positions which can make the whole process easier. These are good positions if you're using prostate toys too.
1. Try lying face down: When you're lying down and comfortable with your legs slightly apart, you can reach behind your back to the anus or perineum. Then, you or your partner can perform the prostate massage.
2. All fours could be for you: You can rest on your hands and knees and reach one hand between your legs or over your lower back to get easy access. Of course, in this position, your partner can also stand or kneel behind you to manage.
3. Lying on the back: Lots of people feel more comfortable on their backs when prostate milking. Pulling your knees towards your chest and holding them with one arm gives easy access.
4. Lying on one side: When lying on one side and bringing your outer knee to your chest, you can reach over your hips to your anus or perineum. You'll have a free hand to get on with the massage.
Why should I try it?
You've got yourself a different erogenous zone in the prostate. It is a highly sensitive area of the body that will generate a sexual response during stimulation. Because the prostate plays a role in producing semen, stimulating it can create a supercharged orgasm during ejaculation.
Some people also practice prostate milking for its purported health benefits rather than sexual stimulation.
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